ten billion butterfly sneezes

Boy, 12, faces drunken driving charge after crash

In the heart of this news story beats a country song.

Let’s recap; according to the canonical standard so brilliantly laid out by Steve Goodman and David Allan Coe, we have:

• Drunk - check.
• Mom - miss.
• Prison - Presuming the Division of Youth Services counts, check.
• Rain - No weather report . Miss.
• Pickup truck - check.
• Train - miss.

OK, so we’re three out of six. There is mention of things that could and should belong in a country song:

• Liquored up - Probably synonymous with drunk, but far more poetic.
• Rodeo - Where would country be without rodeo songs?
• Finding a girl - a staple of the genre.
• Wrecks - more staples. Truckin’ songs are nothing without the wrecks.
• Shotgun - How can a perfect country song not mention these?

So, I’d submit that this incident has all the ingredients to embrace and extend the timeless classic song. I’d take guitar in hand, if I had one and could use it, and record this incident for posterity.

And, yes, I’m thankful these dumbass kids are OK.

-k-

tbbs tags: country music