Tag Archives: Search for America

Geek Truckin’

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MLB and I enjoy our Search for America Tours. The extra time in driving is more than offset by the absence of dealing with poory trained, uncaring, and often surly TSA employees. We can pack as big a bottle of shampoo as we want, and no one cares. We also don’t have to deal with uncaring and surly airline employees, who see us only as cattle, to be herded on and off the plane to make room for the next batch of suckers. We can stop and get our own snacks, meals, and water whenever the need arises. Nevertheless, road trips are lots of hours on, well, the road. So MLB and I look at the 18 wheelers, note what truck line they are from, and opine as to what they may be carrying. On the most recent tour, the following dialogue unfolded:

MLB: I know I’ve asked a thousand times, but what does P.A.M. stand for in the PAM truck lines?

Me: Pluggable Authentication Modules.

I couldn’t find the answer to her question on the PAM website, so I guess my answer’s as good as any1

-k-

1 According to this, the company was founded by Paul A. Maestri, but that isn’t the meaning of P.A.M. It supposedly stands for Pretty Awesome Mileage. It looks like a great company. In some of my wild let’s get away musings, I fantasize about becoming an over the road trucker.

The Search for America Tour Wrap-Up

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We arrived back at tbbs WorldHQ yesterday afternoon, after yet another successful Search for America Tour. The Cadillac was a great car, traffic not too heavy, and the weather favorable, as least as far as the absence of severe weather was concerned.

As we were heading south down I-81 southbound last weekend, we observed a lot of bridge construction in the northbound lanes. This was going on in the Virginia boot1, and was causing 4-5 mile backups when we went through. We decided to alter our return route to avoid that part of Virginia, and wound up heading north from Nashville, to Lexington KY, across Kentucky and West Virginia, where we rejoined I-81 significantly north of all the constructuon. This was a longer route, but the scenery was worth it; Kentucky horse farms, and a ride through the heart of bourbon country spring to mind. We decided we’d like to do another SfAT to Kentucky, and spend some time on the distillery tour circuit, see the Corvette Museum in Bowling Green, and in general, just do touristy stuff. We’ll do that another day.

Our best-laid plans for missing traffic backups went into the dumper less than 10 miles from home, where we endured a seemingly interminable wait on the Fairfax County Parkway. No accidents, no construction, just a gaggle of rude, selfish yuppies blabbing on their cell phones, and honking their horns. I truly lead a charmed life.

Since no tour is complete without metrics, here’s what I have:

  • Total miles: 2249.
  • Our average speed for the entire trip was greater than 60 mph, I think around 65.
  • MPG for the trip: 24.972356554. This is for the first 1874.5 miles; we had the “Bring the car back with empty tank” option.
  • Fuel range remaining at car turn-in: 74. This is the best number of all.

That gas service option is not a great deal; it’s more of a convenience. Avis has a totally different view of both the capacity of the fuel tank and the cost of gas than I do. And the car is never totally empty. Next tour, we stop at the Exxon less than a mile from the Avis return place, and top it off ourselves. Still, I thought bringing it back with 74 miles’ worth of fuel was a Great Thing.
-k-

1 That part of Virginia south of Blacksburg, is how I define it; don’t know if that’s the proper term or not.

Searching for America, Again

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The second of this year’s Search for America Tours starts tomorrow: Destination Arkansas. I had the day off from work; from what I saw on the Weather Channel earlier, I’m thankful we’re not driving through Tennessee tonight. Tomorrow’s prospects seem much brighter.

We just got back from IAD, with our rental Cadillac. Again, it will be a sweet ride.

One thing I’ve been pondering of late is that when I was a lot younger, I considered Cadillacs the epitome of bourgeois decadence, stodgy overpriced transportation that could only be desired by hopelessly out of touch people. As I grow older, I consider a Caddy the best that American auto technology has to offer: stylish, comfortable, and a real treat to drive. I’m sure the Cadillac ads featuring the Led Zeppelin songs helped my change in thinking. What I’d really like to know is, do today’s young people view today’s Cadillac in the same light in which I saw the models of my youth? Am I now considered a hopeless, heartless old wanker by the younger set? I wonder. Maybe I should rename this trip the Old Age and Treachery Tour.

This could be the last Cadillac-powered tour; I think future tours will be powered by Lincoln, a division of Ford, an American car company.

Anyhow, tomorrow, we ride. Fuel economy numbers, and Cracker Barrel reviews will abound. Road bloggin’, too. Good Stuff.

-k-

Goodbye Susan, Hello Dave

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Our TomTom 930 GO GPS is an amazing device; it has replaced Diane, our non-updateable “training wheels” GPS that we bought some time ago1. Diane convinced us that a GPS is a good thing to have, so we bought the TomTom prior to the Search for America Tour’s jaunt to Chicago last summer.

We always choose the text to speech2 conversion option on the TomTom, preferring more information to spoken voice quality. The pre-recorded human voices don’t deal with exit numbers, street names, etc., particularly well. TTS at least attempts to render the text instructions in an intelligible format3. The default voice of the TomTom is a computer-rendered voice named Susan, a pleasant enough TTS voice, which unaccountably started breaking up, to the point of being unintelligible, when reading sufficiently long passages of text.

This afternoon, I updated the unit via TomTom Home. I ran disk repair on the device, and for good measure, downloaded a new TTS computer voice named Dave, and made his voice the default TTS converter. We just took Dave for a spin on a short trip to pick up some supplies beer. And he did well. I just wish he’d said:

And now, friends and neighbors, turn right.

Podcast listeners will be in stitches.

-k-

1 Combination of Easy Pay on QVC, and a beer or three too many helped close that sale.

2 TTS.

3 Though at the cost of a sometimes overly literal interpretation; for example, exit 2S off the 581 in Roanoke was pronounced exit twos.

Be it Ever so Humble

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There’s no place like home, etc. Faithful Cat came up to meet the car as we drove up 2 hours or so ago, and now sleeps on his pillow on the washing machine.

The Cadillac Capitalist Car has been cleaned out and returned to Avis@IAD. We’re catching up on email, Atom feeds, and the like. Mark All Read has been my friend during the feed catch up.

As has been my wont, here are the final numbers for the Search for America Tour I, 2009:

  1. Miles travelled: 2143.
  2. Fuel Consumption: 91.5 Gallons.
  3. Total tour mileage: 23.42
  4. LTD mileage of the car at turn-in: 19.8, up from 18.9 at the start.
  5. Remaining range with fuel left in car at turn-in: 142 miles.

Leaving 142 miles of range in a “bring it back empty” deal hurts a bit; I’d planned on 100 or less. I overfuel like I underbet, I guess. Still, I’d rather be 20 gallons long than half a gallon short in situations like this. MLB has a reluctance to walk down the interstate for fuel.

As the saying goes, “I wouldn’t take a million dollars for the experience, but wouldn’t pay a nickel to do it again.” Until I’m rested up, of course.

-k-

Old Dominion, RoVA Edition

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We’re safely in Roanoke VA, 200+ miles from home. In RoVA1, not NoVA2

It’s amazing to me that one state can encompass salt-of-the-earth common folk, and the effetely pretentious ones to whom we drive tomorrow. Whatever. Faithful Cat will be glad to see us, when we get there.

On the Search for America Tour, Economy Run Division, the average mpg for our fire breathing Cadillac Capitalist Car has risen to 19.6. Our average on this trip is 1903.3 miles/81.9 gallons = 23.23+ mpg. These calculations are important; we have the “bring it back empty” option on the Avis3 rental, so adding enough, though not too much, petrol is my assignment for tomorrow. After a decent Cracker Barrel breakfast, that is.

-k-

1 Rest of Virginia, not where we live.

2 Northern Virginia, home of the type A yuppie douchebags, where we currently live.

3 The Official Car Rental Company of the Search for America Tour.

Eastbound and Down

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Tonight finds us in Cookeville TN, at the Hampton Inn1. We’d originally planned to head back on Thursday, but I’m still fighting off a cold, and the trip down really beat me up. Nodding off at the wheel, as I nearly did a couple of times on the way out, is not a Good Thing. Even though it seems that Cadillac can drive itself. It can’t.

So, we went 480 miles or so today, and plan to be in Roanoke VA, tomorrow night. That’s another 364 miles. Then up early on Friday, and a 225 mile or so run up I-81, and home.

Speaking of the Cadillac, its life-to-date fuel economy is now at 19.4 mpg; we goosed that up from 19.2 on today’s leg. It’s truly a fine car; it has some buttons whose functions totally mystify me. The little icons on them render few clues either. Reminds me of an old joke, with buttons labelled “WA”, “WW”, “PP”, and “ATR”, which decorum prohibits detailing here, except that I’ll not push anything labelled ATR. I promise.

Anyhoo, a few brews, some college hoops on the teevee, an early start tomorrow, another Cracker Barrel2 breakfast, and we’ll be back in the Old Dominion in 24 hours, Lord willing, etc.

-k-

1 The Official Hotel of the Search for America Tour.

2 The Official Restaurant of the Search for America Tour.

Chalks

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The MLK Day racing card at Oaklawn was a reasonably easy one as far as ticket cashing was concerned. I cashed 3 wins and an exacta in the first 8 races. Problem was, favorites dominated the day, so payoffs were light. Combine this with my new-found love of boxing in a longer shot, and profits were razor thin. This indicates I need a review of money management, a crucial, though often overlooked element of any kind of gaming.

On the plus side, the 5 horse in the 4th race was a mortal lock for the win. This horse, named Meeither, paid $8.20 to win, and won handily. I had 4 bucks on this one; two for me, and two for James. Not much of a contribution to the Slusher kids’ scholarship fund, so I’ll just suggest that James and I turn the bounty into some type of liquid refreshment, when next we meet.

I’d forgotten just how enjoyable horse racing is. Man, I had an absolute blast. And Oaklawn is a beautiful place.

-k-

A Day at the Races

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Brother-in-law and I ventured out to the investment bank known as Oaklawn on Saturday afternoon. We had modest results, so we may still both safely be numbered in the working stiffs category.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to a live horse race, though we go to Oaklawn for simulcast wagering on nearly every visit here. Live racing is much better than simulcast, and also drives home the point that my greatest handicap in wagering is, well, my handicapping. I can still read the racing form OK, the small print notwithstanding. Then I struggle over all the strategies that can be applied to this small mountain of data, the “going up in class” ploy, the “going down in class” idea, the “bid, but hung” angle for the last race, the switch from turf to dirt, and on and on. So it was probably fitting that I adopted a simple stategy; I boxed a near-favorite and a resonable, though longer odds horse in an exacta bet, and then bet the longer shot to win. 6 bucks per race, and hence a maximum $54 outlay over the 9 race card.

And the method bore fruit in the 4th race, as a 10-3 exacta fetched $54.40. And again in the 6th, as the 1-5 exacta brought another $21.60. This last win was the outcome of a 1-5-12 exacta box bet; had the 12 horse at least showed, this would have been a nice little ticket to cash. It is worth noting that both these races were maiden claiming races, and hence there was a paucity of data on these lightly-raced horses. So maybe pure dumb luck was my source of success. The money’s just as green, though. We left after the 6th; the hardness of the concrete, and the chill of the day got to us. As it was, I walked out $18 ahead, after paying admission, program, eats, drinks, and wagers. Any day in the black is a good day.

Frequent commenter James left a coment on my last post, wherein he requested that I place a bet on the 5 horse in the 4th. I’d have happily placed the wager on Mrs Stoner Creek, who, if memory serves1, went off at 15-1 or so, 2 pounds overweight, and wound up in 5th or 6th. I’ll probably head back there today, where the 5 in the 4th is named Meeither; morning line is 6-1, with the comment:

Meeither won twice here last year with better speed ratings than most in the field and may surprise today in deep stretch.

So, I’ll probably have the ladies drop me by the track this afternoon; brother-in-law will walk down the hill from his job(he’s working today), and meet me. More yarns will be spun. More wagers will be made. More lies will be told.

This is great!

-k-

1 The paper with the results has already hit the recycle bin; brother and sister-in-law are efficient like that.

Arkansaw

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We arrived safely at 3:30 PM local time yesterday. Still bitterly cold. Would have posted this yesterday, but brother-in-law’s beer was just way too handy.

Oh, and the car is a Cadillac DTS, not a CTS as previously documented. A sweet ride, whose lifetime fuel economy went up to 19.2 mpg on yesterday’s leg of the trip.

So, MLB and her sister will be entertaining their mother. Brother-in-law and I will be left to our own devices. We’ll probably wind up at this fine investment bank, and see what the $2 window can do to augment our retirement nest eggs.

-k-